Funerals

 I must start by saying that I have been to funerals with some of you reading, and what I am about to say in no way is a criticism of the beautiful ceremonies I've been honoured to attend over the years. 

But I've never really seen the point of funerals.

I do understand that it is helpful for people to mark the passing of loved ones in some sort of formal way, and that it can be lovely to assemble family and friends together in one place to express sadness and give comfort.  But I have always found a funeral service - the spiritual part of things- to be a bit....  ummmm...... not sure what the word is.  Put it this way, until today I have said to my family that I dont particularly want a funeral.  And if Keith goes before me then Im not sure I would have been organising one for him.   But today I realised something.

Today ( yesterday) I attended the funeral of the 24 year old young man we were all praying for so fervently last week.  And one thing stood out above all else.  This was not primarily an opportunity for the family to say goodbye to their son - they have been doing that over the past week and will continue to do so over coming months bit by bit and day by day.   Nor was it an opportunity to tell people about his life.  There was some of that happened but I didnt feel it was not the main focus.  The family knew that people who were there or watching on livestream all had their own connections to their son.  No need to tell about his primary school and his University and his jobs and his hobbies.  What did happen was that the family took the chance to honour and say thank you to those people who had made their son's life richer and more blessed.   They paid tribute to his football team, his college friends and most beautifully his best friend who bravely stood and gave a tribute.   They thanked people who had prayed near and far.  They did tell us all about his life, but it was all in the context of the people who had been involved with and surrounded his life.   Much was said about his younger brother who has been an absolute hero this past week and who he loved dearly.  Today I understood something new about the value of a funeral.  It is not only a chance to say goodbye and to grieve together, but it is an opportunity to acknowledge and thank all the people who make a life so rich and precious and valuable and full. 

Sadly, we dont often take the opportunity to tell people how much they mean to us when we and they are alive.  Let's not leave it until we are at a funeral to say thank you to those who enrich our lives and prop us up when we are wobbly.  Lets speak our appreciation for them well and often.  And when they speak those words to us let us receive them and be blessed.